S1E3 - Brody in the House
This week's episode starts out with notable scumbag/Girls Gone Wild creator Joe Francis calling Kris up (apparently from Jail? despite not having a "an inmate from..." message at the start of the call). Joe wants the girls to be the spokesmodels for a new bikini line he's introducing. Kris assures us that although Girls Gone Wild has negative connotations, that this bikini line is high end couture. Because as you know, nothing says "high end couture" like a drunk girl taking her top off for a free hat in Cancun. Kris tells the Kim, Kourtney, and Khloé and they all seem super excited to go down to Mexico for the photo shoot. Kourtney admits to doing her own bikini waxes.
Khloé asks if Bruce knows about the photo shoot and Kris admits that he doesn't. This is an issue because Bruce is very conservative. Kris doesn't want Bruce to know about the photo shoot because it would make him upset (so of course we know that there's a 100% chance that Bruce will find out about it and get upset).
Kris tells Bruce that they're going to be taking a girl's trip to Puerto Vallerta but not the reason for the trip. Kris, Khloé, Kim, and Kourtney arrive at the airport. Apparently they will be flying down on Joe Francis' private jet so Kris gushes about how amazing his private jet is. It seems funny to me that at this point a guy who makes a living getting college girls to take their tops off has a private jet, and the Kardashians don't. Everyone arrives in Mexico to a mariachi band and we get a quick shot of Kris' mom MJ for the first time (but without any label or mention of who she is) Rob (wearing a fedora, shame shame) and Scott are there as well which seems a bit odd for a "girl's trip". Kris tells Kim that she has a spider on her back which causes Kim to completely flip out and start crying.
Back in Calabasas, Bruce makes a delicious spaghetti dinner for Kendall and Kylie and wonders if Kris is eating Tacos for dinner. In Mexico everyone is having a great time and jumping into the pool with their clothes on. The next morning everyone is lamenting having to wake up at 6:00AM for hair and makeup for the photo shoot. I see that Kourtney is a "5 more minutes" person just like me. In Calabasas Brody Jenner comes over and immediately spills the beans about the girls being in Mexico for a Girls Gone Wild bikini photo shoot. Understandably Bruce is NOT happy that Kris lied to him about their trip. Bruce decides to go down to Mexico himself to see what's going on after he can't reach Kris by phone. He then enlists Brody to watch Kendall and Kylie.
Kim, Khloé, and Kourtney are preparing for the photo shoot. The bathing suits actually seem shockingly tasteful. The photo shoot begins and even Rob is a part of it! Kris is as well. This is basically a wholesome family photo shoot at the beach and Bruce really doesn't have anything to worry about. Bruce shows up on the beach in Mexico.
Bruce starts reading Kris out for lying to him about the purpose of their trip. Back in Calabasas, Kendall and Kylie are of course acting insane and being a huge handful for their brother. Kendall then hauls off and kicks Brody square in the family jewels, I guess she doesn't want any little nieces or nephews.
The girls then attempt to tie Brody to the stripper pole in their parents' bedroom. Brody is not having a good day. Brody's manager Frankie shows up so the girls start terrorizing him instead giving Brody a brief reprieve. In Mexico Kourtney sits down and talks with Bruce and assures him that everything they're doing for the photo shoot is very tasteful. Bruce says that his main problem is with Kris because she lied to him. Brody and Frankie trick the girls into walking out to the pool and then lock them out there. Ashley Paige who is in charge of the photo shoot is getting frantic because it's getting near the end of the day which ends up annoying Khloé, Kourtney, and Kim greatly. In a scene directly out of Mean Girls, 8 year old Kylie asks Brody what Girls Gone Wild is and pantomimes taking her shirt off. Frankie starts video taping Kylie on the stripper pole. I feel like I was put onto a list somewhere just for watching this scene.
Back in Mexico, Ashley is saying that they haven't gotten the shot to use for the billboard yet even though its the end of the day. They finally decide on a billboard shot and they pick the one that they took that morning with Rob and Kris in it.
I would be pissed if I had to work all day on a photo shoot and then they just ended up using the first photo they took. Bruce finally sits down to talk with Kris. Kris feels awful about lying to Bruce and apologizes for it, and they go off to take a shower together. The next morning everyone hops on the jet to fly back to California (thankfully Rob is wearing his normal LA Dodgers baseball hat instead of the fedora). Brody is extremely relieved that everyone is back and says that the girls werea handful perfect angels. Two days later Kourtney, Kim, and Khloé are at Dash and they have a phone call with Joe Francis from jail again. Oh shit! Bruce finds the tape of Kylie going all Girls Gone Wild, this will NOT end well. Oh well the episode just ends at this point with Kris saying "I'm going to kill Brody!"
I'd give this episode a 1/10, I would give it a much higher rating except the scenes of Kylie doing Girls Gone Wild made my very soul feel dirty. If you edited those out this episode would probably be like a 7/10. The highlight was Brody getting kicked in the beanbag by Kendall for no apparent reason.
Khloé asks if Bruce knows about the photo shoot and Kris admits that he doesn't. This is an issue because Bruce is very conservative. Kris doesn't want Bruce to know about the photo shoot because it would make him upset (so of course we know that there's a 100% chance that Bruce will find out about it and get upset).
Kris tells Bruce that they're going to be taking a girl's trip to Puerto Vallerta but not the reason for the trip. Kris, Khloé, Kim, and Kourtney arrive at the airport. Apparently they will be flying down on Joe Francis' private jet so Kris gushes about how amazing his private jet is. It seems funny to me that at this point a guy who makes a living getting college girls to take their tops off has a private jet, and the Kardashians don't. Everyone arrives in Mexico to a mariachi band and we get a quick shot of Kris' mom MJ for the first time (but without any label or mention of who she is) Rob (wearing a fedora, shame shame) and Scott are there as well which seems a bit odd for a "girl's trip". Kris tells Kim that she has a spider on her back which causes Kim to completely flip out and start crying.
Back in Calabasas, Bruce makes a delicious spaghetti dinner for Kendall and Kylie and wonders if Kris is eating Tacos for dinner. In Mexico everyone is having a great time and jumping into the pool with their clothes on. The next morning everyone is lamenting having to wake up at 6:00AM for hair and makeup for the photo shoot. I see that Kourtney is a "5 more minutes" person just like me. In Calabasas Brody Jenner comes over and immediately spills the beans about the girls being in Mexico for a Girls Gone Wild bikini photo shoot. Understandably Bruce is NOT happy that Kris lied to him about their trip. Bruce decides to go down to Mexico himself to see what's going on after he can't reach Kris by phone. He then enlists Brody to watch Kendall and Kylie.
Kim, Khloé, and Kourtney are preparing for the photo shoot. The bathing suits actually seem shockingly tasteful. The photo shoot begins and even Rob is a part of it! Kris is as well. This is basically a wholesome family photo shoot at the beach and Bruce really doesn't have anything to worry about. Bruce shows up on the beach in Mexico.
Bruce starts reading Kris out for lying to him about the purpose of their trip. Back in Calabasas, Kendall and Kylie are of course acting insane and being a huge handful for their brother. Kendall then hauls off and kicks Brody square in the family jewels, I guess she doesn't want any little nieces or nephews.
The girls then attempt to tie Brody to the stripper pole in their parents' bedroom. Brody is not having a good day. Brody's manager Frankie shows up so the girls start terrorizing him instead giving Brody a brief reprieve. In Mexico Kourtney sits down and talks with Bruce and assures him that everything they're doing for the photo shoot is very tasteful. Bruce says that his main problem is with Kris because she lied to him. Brody and Frankie trick the girls into walking out to the pool and then lock them out there. Ashley Paige who is in charge of the photo shoot is getting frantic because it's getting near the end of the day which ends up annoying Khloé, Kourtney, and Kim greatly. In a scene directly out of Mean Girls, 8 year old Kylie asks Brody what Girls Gone Wild is and pantomimes taking her shirt off. Frankie starts video taping Kylie on the stripper pole. I feel like I was put onto a list somewhere just for watching this scene.
Back in Mexico, Ashley is saying that they haven't gotten the shot to use for the billboard yet even though its the end of the day. They finally decide on a billboard shot and they pick the one that they took that morning with Rob and Kris in it.
I would be pissed if I had to work all day on a photo shoot and then they just ended up using the first photo they took. Bruce finally sits down to talk with Kris. Kris feels awful about lying to Bruce and apologizes for it, and they go off to take a shower together. The next morning everyone hops on the jet to fly back to California (thankfully Rob is wearing his normal LA Dodgers baseball hat instead of the fedora). Brody is extremely relieved that everyone is back and says that the girls were
I'd give this episode a 1/10, I would give it a much higher rating except the scenes of Kylie doing Girls Gone Wild made my very soul feel dirty. If you edited those out this episode would probably be like a 7/10. The highlight was Brody getting kicked in the beanbag by Kendall for no apparent reason.
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